Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
