Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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