I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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