The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
