I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize