He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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