I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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