how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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