It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize