okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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