I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
