Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
