even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
how does that bad decision feel?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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