Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
