His pubic hair was longer than his dick
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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