How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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