their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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