everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
