Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
