what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
