is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize