He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
