It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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