Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
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