That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize