lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Your topless pictures make me question reality
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
