Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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