pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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