I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
