can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
