what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
