I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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