Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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