There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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