I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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