she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
