Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Randomize
