Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
