marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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