I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
