So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize
