NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
