Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
