i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
