this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
