Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
