so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
