I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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