i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
