Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize
